American Jokes And Humor - 5
This is page 5 of our selection of American jokes and humor.
A guy in a restaurant says to the waitress "I want a cup of coffee without
cream." The waitress comes back a few minutes later and says "I'm sorry, but
we're all out of cream. Would you mind taking your coffee without milk?"
Some small-time crooks decided that people were so stupid that they would
accept 18 dollar bills if somebody gave then any. So they carefully made some
plates and printed some up, and went to a small town to try them out. They got
up to a shopkeeper and talked for awhile, then casually said "Say, can you give
me change for an 18 dollar bill?" "Sure" said the old shopkeeper. "What would
you like, three 6's or two 9's?"
"You should be ashamed," the father told his son, "When Abraham Lincoln was
your age, he used to walk ten miles every day to get to school." "Really?" the
kid said. "Well when he was your age, he was president."
A woman walked into a savings & loan and said to the loan officer, "I'd like
to talk to you about a loan." "Great!" the ecstatic loan officer replied,
"How much can you give us?"
An American, traveling on a train in Europe, met a Cuban tobacco grower,
a Russian vodka distiller and a lawyer. While they were talking business,
the Cuban took out four cigars and passed them around. After lighting his
own cigar, the Cuban took one drag and then threw it out the window,
explaining that cigars were of no consequence in his country since there
was such an abundance of them. After dinner, the Russian passed out bottles
of vodka. After taking just one swig, he threw the bottle out the window,
explaining that vodka was of no consequence since, in Russia, it was so
plentiful. The American businessman sat in quiet contemplation for several
minutes then arose and threw the lawyer out the window.
A Joke At Random
Why is it that political leaders don't seem to have all the answers until they write their memoirs?
You can find more like this in the
Jokes about Politicians category