British Jokes And Humour - 3

 

This is page 3 of British jokes and humour.

---

One day a Viking named Leif returned after a long sea voyage and found that during his absence his name had been removed from the town register. He sent his wife to the town hall make a complaint to the mayor.
'I'm sorry,' said the mayor, 'I must have taken Leif off my census.'

Submitted by : George 

---

What is a water otter?
A kettle.

---

What government agency is responsible for finding lost vicars?
The Bureau of Missing Parsons.

---

What is the opposite of woe?
Gee-up!

---

How does a barber cut the moon's hair?
Eclipse it.

---

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were having a rest in their hotel room when suddenly a tree walked in.
"Elm entry, my Dear Watson," said Holmes.

---

Tourist: Can you tell me the way to Bath please?
Policeman: Well, first you turn on the hot and cold taps then ...

---

Last night there was a big fight in our local fish and chip shop - a lot of fish got battered.

---

I used to dress off the peg, but now my neighbours take in their washing at night.

---

Saliva drools O.K.

A Joke At Random

Doctor, Doctor I think I'm a dog.
How long have you felt like this?
Ever since I was a puppy!

You can find more like this in the Doctors category