Jokes and Funny Stories about Animals - 2

 

This is page 2 of jokes and funny stories about animals.

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What breed of dog wears contact lenses?
A cock-eyed spaniel.

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What kind of dog sniffs out new flowers?
A bud hound.

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What did the cat do after he had eaten some cheese?
He waited by a mouse hole with baited breath.

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What do you call it when a cat stops briefly?
A paws.

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What do you call the place where parrots go to make movies?
Pollywood.

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What happened when the owl lost his voice?
He didn't give a hoot.

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What do you give a sick parrot?
Tweetment.

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What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiig.

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What did one horse say to the other one? Any friend of yours is a palomino.

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On the glass door of the little country store, the stranger noticed a sign saying; DANGER! BEWARE OF THE DOG!. Inside he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor next to the cash register. He asked the storekeeper, "Is THAT the dog we are supposed to beware of?"
"Yep, that's him," he replied.
The stranger couldn't help but laugh. "It certainly doesn't look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world do you need that sign?"
"Because," the storekeeper replied, "before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him."

A Joke At Random

Yo' mama's so stupid, she thinks it's the ice cubes that keeps the fridge cold!

You can find more like this in the Your Mama Jokes category