Jokes and Funny Stories about Animals

 

Here are some jokes and funny stories about animals including dogs, horses and ducks.

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Which rabbits were famous bank robbers?
Bunny and Clyde.

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What did the little bunny rabbit say when he only had thistles to eat?
Thistle have to do.

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What should do you do for a pig that has a sore leg?
Rub it with oinkment.

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How does a pig write home?
With a pig pen.

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Where did the newlywed horses stay?
In the bridle suite.

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What is a thespian pony?
A little horse play

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Why is the old, worn out horse named Flattery?
Because it gets you nowhere.

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A farmer was busy milking one of his cows. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a small bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his milk pail. It went in one ear and out the udder.

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What breed of dog gets on everyone's nerves?
A great pane.

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What breed of dog is always tired when it is in London?
An English sleep dog.

A Joke At Random

How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. It turned itself in.

You can find more like this in the Changing Lightbulbs Jokes category