Jokes & Funny Stories About Cannibals - 2

This is page 2 of jokes and funny stories about cannibals.

What did one cannibal say to another?"Who was that girl I saw you with last night?"
"That was no girl, that was my supper."

Why was the cannibal expelled from school?
Because he kept buttering up the teacher.

The cannibal came home to find his wife chopping up snakes and a very small man.
"Oh no!" he groaned. "Not snake and pygmy pie again."

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

Two cannibals were having lunch.
One cannibal said "your wife makes a great soup."
"Yes" said the other one, "but I'm sure gonna miss her."

A cannibal is watching his friend, also a cannibal. His friend walks up to someone and eats him, then comes back and announces 'I'm a vegetarian.'
'But I just saw you eat that person!' The first cannibal cries.
'That's because he was a swede.'

Submitted by : Derf 

Two cannibals had just cooked up a missionary, and were having dinner. The first says to the second, "Hey, what do you think of this missionary?" The second replies, "Quite tasty much better than those pork pies they used to serve us at the London School of Economics."

First Cannibal: "We had robbers at our house yesterday."
Second Cannibal: "Did you enjoy them?"
First Cannibal: "yes, but they weren't as good as the missionaries we had last week."

Two ferocious cannibal chiefs sat licking their fingers after a large meal. "Your wife makes a delicious roast," one chief said. "Thanks," his friend said. "I'm gonna miss her."

'Doc,' said the cannibal to the witch doctor, 'I have terrible heartburn.'
'What have you been eating?' said the witch doctor.
'A lot of missionaries with hooded robes and bald heads,' said the cannibal.
'How do you cook them?' inquired the witch doctor.
'I boil them in a big iron pot,' said the head hunter.
'You idiot!' screamed the witch doctor. Those aren't boilers - they're friars!'

A Joke At Random

A traffic cop flagged down a motorist and said, 'I'm arresting you for going through three red lights.'
'Yeah, well, I'm colour blind,' said the motorist.
'In addition to that, you were exceeding the speed limit,' said the policeman. 'So what?' said the motorist. 'And on top of all that you were going the wrong way down a one-way street,' added the officer. 'I always did have a lousy sense of direction,' said the motorist with a smile.
At that point, his wife leaned forward from the ,back seat and said, 'Don't pay any attention to him, officer. He always talks like this when he's had a few drinks.'

You can find more like this in the Car Driving category