Christmas Jokes and Funny Stories - 2

This is page 2 of Christmas Jokes and Funny Stories to help you see the humorous side of the festive season.

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas?
A merry Christmas to ewe.

What is a hairdressers favourite Christmas carol?
"Oh comb all ye faithful".

What are gnomes the most afraid of at Christmas?
That Father Christmas will give them the sack.

What carol do elephants like to sing at christmas?
Noel-ephants, Noel-ephants...

What did Adam say on December 24th?
It's Christmas, Eve.

How to cats greet each other at Christmas?
"I wish you a furry merry Christmas and a Happy mew year".

Why does Father Christmas go down chimneys?
Because they soot him.

What happens to you at Christmas?
Yule be happy.

What did Santa Claus's wife say during a thunderstorm?
"Come and look at the rain, dear."

What do angry rodents send each other at Christmas time?
Cross mouse cards.

A Joke At Random

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker were having one of their little father and son chats... lightsabres drawn and sparks flying. Vader pinned Luke against a bulkhead and glared into his face, "I know what you're getting for Christmas, Luke," he said, "Ohhh, yes! I know!" Luke fought himself free and jumped to a higher platform just out of Vader's reach, "How do you know!?" Luke yelled at him, "How do you know what I'm getting for Christmas!?"
Darth Vader shot Luke an icy glare, "The force is with me... I felt your presents."

You can find more like this in the Christmas category