Jokes And Funny Stories About Girlfriends

 

Here are a few jokes and funny stories about girlfriends.

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I call my girlfriend 'Laryngitis' because she's a right pain in the neck.

My girlfriend's cooking is just like a good man, hard to keep down.

John: My girlfriend reminds me of a Greek statue.
Dave: You mean she's very beautiful?
John: Yeah, beautiful, but not all there.

What did the undertaker say to his new girlfriend?
Em-balmy about you.

My new girlfriend is a pretty as a flower.
A cauliflower.

Why is a launderette not a good place to find a girlfriend?
If she cannot even afford to buy her own washing machine, she will never have enough money to support you.

Last night I told my girlfriend that I would go to the end of the world for her, and she said, "Yes but would you stay there?"

My girlfriend has a complexion like a peach.
All yellow and fuzzy.

When I asked my girlfriend if I could see her home she handed me a picture of it.

My girlfriend just saved me a lot of money - she married someone else.


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A Joke At Random

What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A whine cellar.

You can find more like this in the Jokes About Blondes category