Jokes And Funny Stories About Marriage

Yes, here are the jokes and funny stories about marriage and married life. Plus some jokes about getting married. Hope my wife does not see these. This is page 1 of 8

Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it!

A smart wife will always ask her husband's opinion - after she has made up her mind.

My wife has a terrible memory - she never forgets anything.

My wife wanted to see the world, so I bought an atlas.

Each year on his wedding anniversary he goes down to City Hall in the hope that his marriage license has expired.

Many a poor husband was once a rich bachelor.

Husband: You have to admit that men have much better judgement than women.
Wife: You're right. You married me and I married you.

Fred: Have you ever seen one of those machines that can tell when someone is telling a lie?
Joe: Seen one? I married one!

I don't need to buy an encyclopedia - my wife knows everything.

Policeman: I am sorry to have to tell you this Mr Brown, but you wife has just fallen into the wishing well and drowned.
Mr Brown: It works!

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A Joke At Random

Those three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are. The first one says: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow". The second one says: "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet". The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says: "You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45"!!

You can find more like this in the Miscellaneous Jokes category