Jokes and Funny Stories about Restaurants and Food

 

Waiters, food and restaurants have always been a good source of Jokes and Funny Stories.

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Customer: Why don't you have doggie bags?
Waiter: That would be considered cruelty to animals.

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Customer: This food tastes terrible. You told me that the meals here were just like the ones your mother used to make.
Waiter: They are. She couldn't cook either.

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Sign in a restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."

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"What flavors of ice cream do you have?" asked the customer.
"We have Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate," answered the new waitress in a hoarse whisper.
Trying to be sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have laryngitis?"
"No...." replied the waitress with some effort, "just...erm.... vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate."

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Why did the man order alphabet soup in the restaurant?
He wanted to eat his words.

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Waiter, there's a strange film on my soup.
Well, what do you expect for one Dollar, Star Wars?

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Waiter, waiter, you've given me a wet soup plate.
That's your soup, sir.

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Waiter, there's a hand in my soup.
"That's not your soup, sir, it's the finger bowl.

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"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
"I'm not surprised, sir, our chef used to be a tailor."

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Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley. "I was in that new restaurant across the street," said one. "It's so clean! The kitchen is spotless, the floors are gleaming white. It's so sanitary the whole place shines." "Please," said the other roach, frowning. "Not while I'm eating!"

A Joke At Random

I don't care who you are, get those reindeer and that sleigh off my roof.

You can find more like this in the Christmas category