Jokes & Funny Stories About Restaurants & Food

Waiters, food and restaurants have always been a good source of jokes and funny stories.

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Waiter, there's a strange film on my soup.
Well, what do you expect for one Dollar, Star Wars?

Waiter, waiter, you've given me a wet soup plate.
That's your soup, sir.

Waiter, there's a hand in my soup.
"That's not your soup, sir, it's the finger bowl.

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!"
"I'm not surprised, sir, our chef used to be a tailor."

Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley. "I was in that new restaurant across the street," said one. "It's so clean! The kitchen is spotless, the floors are gleaming white. It's so sanitary the whole place shines." "Please," said the other roach, frowning. "Not while I'm eating!"

Customer: Waiter, what's this fly doing in my ice-cream?
Waiter: Looks like he's learning to ski.

Waiter to customer: "I know your steak is frozen. I told you it would melt in your mouth, didn't I?"

What kind of lettuce was served on the Titanic?
Iceberg.

Sponge cake: Dessert made from borrowed ingredients.

"Waiter, do you serve crabs?"
"Sit down, sir. We serve anybody."

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