clean Jokes and Funny Stories

Here is a randomly chosen joke or funny story :-

What do you call a baby budgie?
A budget.

Jokes and Funny Stories about Women Car Drivers

 

Here are a few jokes and funny stories about women car drivers.


Policeman: I've had my eye on you for some time now.
Young Lady: That's funny. I thought you were arresting me for speeding.


We bumped into some old friends yesterday, my wife was driving.


My wife is a careful driver, she always slows down when going through a red light.


Nothing confuses a man more than a woman driver who does everything right.


My wife wanted a foreign convertible, so I bought her a rickshaw.


A traffic policeman stops a woman and asks to see her driving licence.
'Lady, it says here that you should be wearing glasses when driving.'
'Well,' replies the woman, 'I have contacts.'
'Lady, I don't care who you know, your still going to get a ticket.'


Wife: "There's trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor."
Husband: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous."
Wife: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."
Husband: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. Where's the car?"
Wife: "In the swimming pool."


Policeman: 'When I saw you coming round that bend I thought, "Forty-five at least".'
Woman motorist: 'Well, I always look older in this hat.'


A young lady was driving through a built-up area at about 70 mph when she noticed a motorcycle policeman on her tail. She increased her speed to 80 mph but the cop hung grimly on her tail. She put her foot down and pushed the car up to 90, drawing rapidly away from her pursuer. Suddenly she saw a garage up ahead and with a squeal of brakes she pulled up in the forecourt and dashed into the ladies' toilet. Five minutes later she emerged to find the motor-cycle policeman waiting for her. With a sweet smile she said, 'I bet you thought I'd never make it in time.'


My wife had a nasty accident with the car this morning. She backed it out of the garage, completely forgetting that the night before, she had backed it in.







A Joke At Random

Knock, Knock. Who's there?
Millicent.
Millicent who?
Millicent me round to knock on your door.

You can find more like this in the Knock Knock Jokes category