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Random Jokes and Funny Stories

 

These jokes and funny stories are selected at random from our jokes and funny stories database. Press "refresh" on your browser to see another random selection of jokes.

Change Light Bulb

How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only one, but you have to nag him for a fortnight first.

Located in the Change Light Bulb section

Change Light Bulb

How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?
Two, the old one and the new one.

Located in the Change Light Bulb section

Doctors

A boy called the doctor..
"Doctor, doctor come quick, my younger brother has just swallowed my pen."
"I'll be right over - what are you doing in the meantime?"
"I'm using a pencil..."

Located in the Doctors section

Did You Hear?

Did you hear about the new deodorant that has just been invented? It is called "Vanish".
You spray it on and you become invisible - so no one knows where the smell is coming from.

Located in the Did You Hear? section

Knock Knock

Knock, Knock. Who's there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup with me later and I will tell you.

Located in the Knock Knock section

Christmas

Who is the biggest problem for Santa in his workshop?
The elf and safety officer.

Located in the Christmas section

Drunks

"I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am.
It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get."

Located in the Drunks section

Animals

Just how deep into the water can a frog go?
Knee-deep.

Located in the Animals section

Men

A traveling saleswoman is driving toward home in Arizona when she sees an Indian woman hitchhiking. She stops the car and the Indian woman gets in. After a bit of small talk, the Indian woman notices a brown bag on the front seat. "What's in the bag?", she asks. "It's a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband".
The Indian woman is silent for a while, then nods and says,
"you made a good trade".

Located in the Men section



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