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Change a Lightbulb Jokes - Page 7


The classic 'change lightbulbs' jokes


This is page 7 of 12.


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How many Quality managers does it take to change a light bulb?
We've formed a quality circle to study the problem of why light bulbs burn out and to determine the best thing we as managers can do to enable light bulbs to work smarter, not harder.
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How many executives does it take to change a light bulb?
A roomful - they have to hold a meeting to discuss all the ramifications of the change.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?
Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
That depends on whether it has health insurance.
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How many veterinarians does it take to change a light bulb?
Three. One to change the bulb and two more to complain that an MD makes ten times as much for the same procedure!!
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How many laboratory heads (senior researchers, etc.) does it take to change a light bulb?
Five one to change the light bulb, the other four to stand around arguing whether he/she is taking the right approach.
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How many statisticians does it take to change a light bulb?
One -- plus or minus three (small sample size).
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How many Pentagon procurement officers does it take to change a light bulb?
Look, for only $87 billion, we can put up this chain of fluorescent satellites that will illuminate the whole planet.
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How many municipal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Seven - two to administer the Civil Service examination for the Light Bulb Administrator position, the Commissioner of Public Works, who ends up hiring his brother for the position anyway, one to plow the mayor's driveway, a Summer Youth student to actually screw it in, and a Union steward to protest that its the electrician's job to screw in light bulbs.
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How many city planners does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Six - four to write an extensive study recommending a three-way 100/200/250 watt light bulb, one to write an article in the newspaper praising the study, and one to put in a 10 watt bulb instead.

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