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Funny Answering Machine Messages - Page 3


Here are more of our funny, amusing and strange joke answering machine messages.


This is page 3 of 9.


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Greetings from the school of Computer Generated Music, in a moment we will play one of our shorter selections, after which you may leave a message.

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"Hello, I am actually home at the moment, but I really don't feel like listening to whatever your problem is. So, If you leave your name and number at the tone, when I feel like responding to your message, I will."

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"Terribly sorry, but you've reached an answering machine."

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"You have reached 555-5678, DIAL-A-DEMON. At the sound of the tone you will be possessed."

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"Hello? Hello? I can't hear you. I guess that's 'cos I'm not at home right now. But if you'll leave a message, I'll be sure to get back to you..."

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Hi, this is Fred. I just stepped outside to get the paper, and the door locked behind me. Luckily, I left the answering machine on. So, while I'm outside, shivering in my underwear, you can leave a message. Then, when the landlord lets me back in, I can get back to you.

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"This is a boring answering machine message. Leave a message anyway." because I'm sick of people ringing the phone at 1am just so they can hear the clever messages I usually have, and then hanging up without even leaving a "like your message" message.

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This is the Literacy Self Test Hotline. After the tone, leave your name and number and recite a sentence using today's vocabulary word. Today's word is supercilious

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The President is not in his office at this time. Please leave your name, phone number, the name of the country you wish to invade, and the secret password.

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Kemosabe no in tipi now. You leave'um message after little smoke signal, and Kemosabe get back for pow-wow real fast.


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