This is page 4 of 4. Showing jokes 31 to 33
This man wrote into the Daily Mirror for some advice. He said, 'Dear Marge, I must get this off my chest. I did this awful golf shot, and the ball didn't go anywhere near: the green. In fact it landed on this bloke's head and killed him. What shall I do?'
Marge said, 'Try and get more rhythm in your swing.'
My brother went to the doctor and said, 'Some days, I get the strange feeling that I'm a golf club.'
The doctor said, 'Can I join?'
My brother went to the doctor's and said, 'Some days, I think I'm a golf ball.'
The doctor said, 'Well you've come a fair way to see me...'
Here are some randomly selected jokes from other categories
Pigs
Why should you never tell your secrets to a pig?
Because he is a squealer.
A Pack Of Cards
My friend said, 'That bloke over there thinks he's a pack of cards.'
My brother said, 'I'll have to deal with him later.'
Waiters
Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup.'
'No, sir, actually that's the chef. The last customer was a witch doctor.'
Gorillas
What do you call a huge gorilla who loves to dance?
King Conga.
Puzzles
What do jigsaw puzzles do when they receive bad news?
They go to pieces.
Henry VIII
Which famous English King invented fractions?
Henry the 1/8th.
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