Joke Topic - 'Balloon'

What did Santa get when he crossed a reindeer with a piece of wood?
A hat rack.

Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Liz.
Liz who?
Liz see what you look like.

How do you start an onion race?
"Onion marks! Get set! Go!

Is there another word for synonym?

When you take a stand about something, you're just being stubborn.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

Did you hear about the blonde that threw away her weight loss video because she noticed that the people on the video were not losing weight either?

There are two sorts of politicians: those who can talk nonsense on any subject under the sun, and those who don’t need a subject.

A fool-proof method for sculpting an elephant: first, get a huge block of marble then you chip away everything that doesn't look like an elephant.