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Joke Topic - 'Cats'

Here are 49 jokes on the topic - 'Cats'.


A man hated his wife's cat so much that he decided to get rid of it by driving it two miles from home and leaving it there. But when returned home, he saw the cat sitting at his front door.
So, the next day he drove the cat five miles away and left it there, but when he arrived back home, the cat was once again waiting for him at his front door.
By now he was desperate to get rid of the cat, so this time he drove the cat fifty miles out into the country and left it in the middle of a dense forest.
Five hours later, his wife answered the phone at home. It was her husband.
"Honey," he asked, "is the cat there?"
"Yes," said the wife. "Why?"
"Can put him on the line, please? I'm lost and I need directions to get me home."

And now spell mousetrap in three letters.
C, A, T

Cats flattened while you watch.

Did you hear about the cat that fell in the yogurt?
He's a sour puss now.

Did you hear about the cat who drank 3 bowls of milk?
He set a new lap record.

Did you hear about the Scottish father who had a dilemma? His son wanted a dog and his daughter wanted a cat. He felt that having a cat and a dog would be too expensive. So he bought a cat and taught it to bark!

Did you hear about the special offer at the pet store this weekend?
Buy one cat — get one flea!

Did you hear about the young cat who went to work for the Red Cross?
She wanted to be a first aid kit.

Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives?

Dogs and small children must be carried on the escalator
- if don't have a dog a cat will do

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