A little girl asked her father, 'do all fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time"?
The father replied, 'No, some begin with - If I am elected.'
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
dumb
Your mumma is so dumb she took a ruler 2 bed 2 c how long she slept!
drunks
I knew that I must be drunk when I started feeling sophisticated - and couldn't pronounce it.
dogs
What does a dog use for playing golf?
A kennel club.
wife
John: My wife drives me to drink.
Henry: You're lucky. I have to walk.
Santa Claus
Who used to take presents to the famous detective, Sherlock Holmes?
Santa Clues.
fish
What do fish play on the piano?
Scales!
cold
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ken.
Ken who?
Ken I come in? It's really cold standing here.
pessimists
How many PESSIMISTS does it take to change a light-bulb?
"What's the point? It'll only blow again."
work
If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?
