Did you know, Peter, I got a new set of golf clubs for my wife last week.'
'Oh, David, what a bargain.'
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Knock Knock
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ross.
Ross who?
Ross beef and Yorkshire pudding.
Prehistoric
What do you call prehistoric sailing disasters?
Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
Cannibals
What is a cannibal's favorite type of pizza?
Extra large, with everybody on it.
Frogs
What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
Hoppalong Cassidy.
French
Twelve year old in French class being asked the difference between Madame and Mademoiselle: `Monsieur'.
Drinking
I don't have a drinking problem.
I drink
I get drunk
I fall down
No problem
Cows
What do you get if you cross a cow and a duck?
Milk and quackers.
Perfect
You must must think I'm the perfect idiot.
No, you're not perfect.
Eat
Waiter, waiter, I can't eat this.
Why not, sir?
Because you haven't given me a knife and fork.