A couple of hikers were tramping through the countryside and had lost their way, so by the time they arrived at the "George and Dragon", the village pub where they'd arranged to stay the night, the doors were locked and the owners had gone to bed. They knocked timidly on the front door.
A head appeared at an upstairs window and shouted, 'Go away. Don't you know what time it is? We're closed,' and the the window slammed shut.
Undeterred, the hikers knocked again. 'What is it now?' demanded the head.
'Could we speak to George this time please?' asked on the the hikers.
Here are some randomly selected joke topics
Light Bulbs
How many Chinamen does it take to change a light bulb?
Thousands, because Confucious say many hands make light work.
Executive
He is a born executive . . . his father owns the business.
The Statue Of Liberty
Q. What does the Statue of Liberty stand for?
A. Because it can't sit down.
Sings
What has eight feet and sings?
A quartet.
Landlord
The landlord said he wanted me to treat the place like my own home. So I did - I didn't pay the rent.
Cats
What do you call a woman with a cat on her head?
Kitty
Husband
Janet: My husband talks in his sleep.
Mary: Why not take him to the doctor?
Janet: Are you kidding? It's the only time he talks to me.
Soup
Waiter, waiter, you've given me a wet soup plate.
That's your soup, sir.
Knock Knock
Knock knock,
Who's there?
Kermit.
Kermit who?
Kermit a crime and you will go to jail.