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Joke Topic - 'Magician'


Here are 4 jokes on the topic - 'Magician'.

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He's a magician. He can turn absolutely anything into an argument.
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My wife is a magician. She can turn anything into an argument.
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Once upon a time there was a cruise ship sailing. On board, a magician was giving a show to some passengers. The magician ALWAYS had a parrot on his shoulder. Whenever the magician told a joke, the parrot would give it away. One time the magician had a knife, he spun it around it dissappeared! The parrot said "It's in his pocket, it's in his pocket". The crowd booed him because the parrot gave it away. The next trick he did, he waved a wand around and it vanished. Again, the parrot said, "It's up his sleeve! It's up his sleeve!" The magician got mad because he couldn't keep any of his tricks secret. The parrot kept giving them away.
One day the cruise ship sank. The magician and the parrot managed to make it to an island where they stayed for about 3 months when the parrot, all of a sudden, burst out and asked:
"Ok, I give up! Where'd you hide the ship?"
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What does a soccer player and a magician have in common?
They both like hat tricks.


Here are some randomly selected joke topics

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Mice

My mother in law called today...
I knew it was her, when she knocked on the front door all the mice threw themselves on the traps!
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Hired

It's no use asking me. I was hired for my looks.
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Soap

How did your mom know that you didn't wash your face?
I forgot to wet the soap.
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Roman

Which famous Roman general always had colds?
Julius Sneezer!
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Jewelry

What do you call a piece of jewelry that has been lost in the long grass on a golf course?
A diamond in the rough.
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Donkeys

How do you get five donkeys on a fire engine?
Two in the front, two in the back, and one on the roof going EE-AW-EE-AW.
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Telepathy

Legalize telepathy - I knew you were going to say that
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Everything

Go ahead, tell them everything you know. It'll only take 10 seconds.
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Dogs

Brian: Yesterday my dog grabbed my dictionary and started chewing it. Fred: So what did you do?
Brian: I took the words right out of his mouth.

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