Joke Topic - 'Parliament'

You know your boyfriend is in love with you when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking that I've been here before.
Oh, no, not you again.

When a man was reading the newspaper, his wife asked, "Will you still love me when I'm old and gray?" "Sure I do," he mumbled.

My friend says that you can speak in cat language. Is it true?
Me - how?

John said, 'That bloke up at the tea counter thinks he's a snooker ball.'
My brother said, 'Ah, so that's why he's at the end of the queue.

It's no use asking me. I was hired for my looks.

The landlord said he wanted me to treat the place like my own home. So I did - I didn't pay the rent.

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Which newspaper do cows enjoy reading?
The Daily Moos.