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Joke Topic - 'Vicar'


Here are 2 jokes on the topic - 'Vicar'.

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My dad went down the churchyard. He said to the vicar, 'Would you like me to put some locks on the cemetery gates?'
The vicar said, 'There's no point. The ghosts have all got skeleton keys.'
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This vicar said, 'I like graveyards. They're never deserted.'
The sexton said, 'Really Father, why's that?'
The vicar said, 'Well there's always some body there.'


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Love To

I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV.
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Young

When I was young I had a lot of spots and pimples. One day I fell asleep in a library. I woke up and a blind man was reading my face.
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Dieting

I'm so overweight I tried dieting - but the only thing I lost was my temper!
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Elephants

What do you get if you cross an elephant with a fish?
A pair of swimming trunks.
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Cars

If this car was a horse I'd have to shoot it.
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Imaginary

We're sorry. You have reached an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.
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Dance

Where can you dance in California?
San Frandisco.
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Eggs

How can you drop and egg six feet without it breaking?
By dropping it seven feet - it won't break for the first six.
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Vampires

Why do vampires try to avoid getting into arguments?
Because they make themselves cross.

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