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The Joke of the Day Archive - Page 10

This is page 10 of our 'The Joke of the Day' archive and it covers from Friday, October 5th, 2018 to Thursday, October 11th, 2018.

The Joke of the day for Thursday, October 11th, 2018

There's this drunk guy who decides that he wants to go fishing. He packs up all his tackle and sets out in search of a suitable spot.
Eventually, he stumbles across a huge area of ice and decides that he'll give it a go. Taking out a saw from his tackle box, he starts to saw a whole. Suddenly, a loud voice booms out at him, "There's no fish in here." The drunk looks all around him but can't see anyone. He decides to ignore the voice and carries on sawing.
Again, the voice booms out, "I've told you once, there's no fish in here!" He looks up again but there's still no sign of anyone so he returns to his task.
"Stop it!" shouts the now very angry sounding voice, "You'd better pack up your stuff and get out of here or there'll be trouble."
"Who are you" shouts the drunk guy, "you don't scare me!"
"Look," replies the voice, "I'm the manager of this Ice Rink!"

The Joke of the day for Wednesday, October 10th, 2018

How many politically correct people does it take to change a light bulb?
None. "Why should we impose our values on the light bulb? If it wishes to be a light bulb of no light, we should respect its uniqueness and individuality."

The Joke of the day for Tuesday, October 9th, 2018

Knock, Knock. Who's there?
Carrie who?
Carrie me home please, I'm very tired.

The Joke of the day for Monday, October 8th, 2018

What award does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque.

The Joke of the day for Sunday, October 7th, 2018

An idiot took a photograph of his son to the photo store. 'I wonder,' he said, 'could you enlarge this for me?' 'Yes, certainly,' the assistant replied. 'And would it be possible for you to take his hat off for me?' 'Well, I'm sure we could do something. Yes, we could touch it up for you.' 'Oh, that's fine.' 'Tell me,' said the assistant, 'which side does your son part his hair?'
The idiot smiled. 'Oh, come on now. You'll see that when you take his hat off.'

The Joke of the day for Saturday, October 6th, 2018

What do you call a very intelligent monster?
Frank Einstein.

The Joke of the day for Friday, October 5th, 2018

What does a dog get when it graduates from dog school?
A pedigree.

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