Home / The Joke of the Day / The Joke of the Day Archive - Page 11

The Joke of the Day Archive - Page 11


This is page 11 of our 'The Joke of the Day' archive and it covers from Friday, December 14th, 2018 to Thursday, December 13th, 2018.

The Joke of the day for Thursday, December 13th, 2018

Why is an astronaut like an American footballer?
They both like to make safe touch-downs.

The Joke of the day for Wednesday, December 12th, 2018

After suffering through years of his wife's awful coffee, the man spat it out and took the coffee maker to his lawyer.
Dropping it on the attorney's desk, the man growled, "Here they are!"
"Here are what?" the startled lawyer asked.
"Grounds for Divorce."

The Joke of the day for Tuesday, December 11th, 2018

"And what will you do when you grow up to be as big as me?" asked the father of his little son.
"Diet."

The Joke of the day for Monday, December 10th, 2018

How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
One third less than for a regular bulb.

The Joke of the day for Sunday, December 9th, 2018

A plumber was called to fix a blocked pipe. He arrived, banged on the pipes for 15 minutes, and said to the homeowner, well that'll be $35.
The homeowner said "thirty five dollars!!!!- why thats $140 per hour!! I'm a lawyer and I only make $100 an hour!!"
The plumber replies, "yeah, thats what I got when I was a lawyer."

The Joke of the day for Saturday, December 8th, 2018

A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected a large crowd gathered. A lawyer, anxious to make money from the accident could not get near the car. Being such a smart guy, he started shouting loudly, "Let me through! Let me through! I'm the son of the victim." The crowd made way for him.
Lying in front of the car was a donkey.

The Joke of the day for Friday, December 14th, 2018

Patient: Doctor, doctor, I keep seeing frogs in front of my eyes.
Doctor: Don't worry, it's only a hoptical illusion.

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