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The Joke of the Day Archive - Page 12

This is page 12 of our 'The Joke of the Day' archive and it covers from Sunday, July 21st, 2019 to Saturday, July 27th, 2019.

The Joke of the day for Saturday, July 27th, 2019

Three tourists were driving through Wales. As they were approaching Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter one asked the blonde employee, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?" The girl leaned over the counter and said, "Burrrrrr, gerrrrrr, Kiiiiiing."

The Joke of the day for Friday, July 26th, 2019

Did you hear about the animal hotel that has exclusive accommodation for squirrels?
It's called The Nutcracker Suite.

The Joke of the day for Thursday, July 25th, 2019

The Three Bears returned one sunny sunday morning from a stroll in the woods to find the door of their little house open. Cautiously, they went inside. After a while, big Daddy Bear's deep voice boomed out, "Someone's been eating MY porridge!" Mummy Bear gave a yelp, "Someone's been eating MY porridge!", she said. Little Baby Bear rushed in, "Forget the porridge - someone's nicked the DVD player!"

The Joke of the day for Wednesday, July 24th, 2019

What do refrigeration engineers do in their spare time?
They chill out.

The Joke of the day for Tuesday, July 23rd, 2019

What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin pi.

The Joke of the day for Monday, July 22nd, 2019

What do you call an overweight ghost that haunts an opera house?
The fat-tum of the opera.

The Joke of the day for Sunday, July 21st, 2019

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were each left £10,000 by a rich man on condition that after his death each put £100 pounds in his coffin in case he needed it in the afterlife.
The Englishman put in 100 pounds, the Irishman put in 100 pounds and the Scotsman took out the two hundred pounds and put in a cheque for three hundred.

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