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The Joke of the Day Archive - Page 5


This is page 5 of our 'The Joke of the Day' archive and it covers from Saturday, March 16th, 2019 to Friday, March 22nd, 2019.

The Joke of the day for Friday, March 22nd, 2019

Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Etch.
Etch who?
Bless you.

The Joke of the day for Thursday, March 21st, 2019

"I have good news and bad news," a defence attorney told his client. "First the bad news. The blood test came back, and your DNA is an exact match with that found at the crime scene."
"Oh, no!" cried the client. "What's the good news?"
"Your cholesterol is down to 140."

The Joke of the day for Wednesday, March 20th, 2019

What do you get if you cross a supermarket cashier with a 100 bars of chocolate?
A chubby checker.

The Joke of the day for Tuesday, March 19th, 2019

A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.
"But officer," the man began, "I can explain."
"Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back."
"But, officer, I just wanted to say,..."
"And I said to keep quiet! You're going to jail!" A few hours later the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "Lucky for you that the chief's at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back."
"Don't count on it," answered the fellow in the cell. "I'm the groom."

The Joke of the day for Monday, March 18th, 2019

What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper?
A slippery customer.

The Joke of the day for Sunday, March 17th, 2019

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

The Joke of the day for Saturday, March 16th, 2019

Which famous Disney cartoon character has large antlers and wears white gloves?
Mickey Moose.

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